"You Can't Save Them All"

“You can't save them all.” In my thirty four years of teaching, I've had not one, but two administrators say this to me about one of my students. I can't begin to tell you how this statement angers me! What is our job as teachers? I believe it is to impact our students so that the world will be a better place, To teach them empathy, social skills, peaceful conflict resolution, and a whole host of other soft skills, on top of the academics.

My job IS to save them all! If I don't believe this with my whole heart, then I'm in the wrong profession. I need to love them fiercely, regardless of their idiosyncrasies, their gender, their race, the socio-economic place in society. Accept them where they are, as they are. That's our job! So when an administrator says, “You can't save them all,” I think it's time for that administrator to step away from public education.

I am reminded about a poem, first brought to my attention by a fellow teacher, very good friend, and simply amazing human being! In her address to the district upon being named the Elementary Teacher of the Year for the district, Holly Schreiber shared this story with the rest of us. It touched me then, just as much as it continues to touch me and I try to emulate the idea behind it. I will share here:

The Legend of the Starfish

A vacationing businessman was walking along a beach when he saw a young boy. Along the shore were many starfish that had been washed up by the tide and were sure to die before the tide returned. The boy was walked slowly along the shore and occasionally reached down and tossed the beached starfish back into the ocean. The businessman, hoping to teach the boy a little lesson in common sense, walked up to the boy and said, "I have been watching what you are doing, son. You have a good heart, and I know you mean well, but do you realize how many beaches there are around here and how many starfish are dying on every beach every day. Surely such an industrious and kind hearted boy such as yourself could find something better to do with your time. Do you really think that what you are doing is going to make a difference?" The boy looked up at the man, and then he looked down at a starfish by his feet. He picked up the starfish, and as he gently tossed it back into the ocean, he said, "It makes a difference to that one."

     This is how I feel teaching should be, to make a difference to that one.

God Knows...

God Knows...

After posing last night, I went back to reading one of the books I'm on now, “Shattering the Perfect Teach Myth,” by Aaron Hogan who is an assistant principal in Texas, and a Twitter-Teacher that I follow. His book has been suggested by several people in Twitter-verse.

Anyway, last night's post was kind of a downer and I was doubting my efficiency as a teacher on many levels. Then I come to chapter nine in the book, entitled, “When We're Not Enough.” Friends!! This was just what I needed and God knew I needed that chapter then and now! Let me share with you a few of the quotes from Aaron's book, chapter nine:

• “We have to remember that our efforts have their limits and that our students ( and their parents) are the ones who must take final ownership over their decisions....” .”...we cannot make the choice for the students (or their parents.” Powerful stuff!!
• “I would go so far as to say I felt called to this profession, even designed to do this. And in many cases, I felt like I did this well.” Preach!
• “...I felt a little hopeless and started questioning myself.” Me. Last night.
• “Educators should feel okay to be worn out by their job. They should be okay with recognizing that at times, we have to pull back to recharge. And they should know that their work is tough and they don't have to be Superman and act like it's not weighing on them.” Thank you, Aaron, for this!
• “As an educator, our work is absolutely going to push us to our limits. We discover those limits by giving every last bit of ourselves to the students (and families, I might add) that we serve.”

Aaron goes on to give some tips of what we can do. He says we should:

• Set a goal of relentlessly pursuing and pushing students toward success.
• Believe that all you have to offer is enough.

He goes on to say, “Every kid deserves to be known and served well at school.”

Aaron quotes psychologist, Brene' Brown as saying, “When we make the transition from crazy-busy to rest, we have to find out what comforts us, what really refuels us, and do that.” For me, it's reading. Escaping into a good book. And I thank God that's what it is, especially last night, when I needed these words the most.

Aaron also says, “...we are not enough on our own to be everything that every student (or their family) needs. We have to be okay with that.” “We cannot give our all to everything. There's just not enough of us to go around.” He gives some ideas to combat that:

• Identify your pitfalls
• Define your priorities
• Gut check regularly (preferably with someone you trust who will be honest with you)

He says, “The work you are doing and your relationships with others are too important to pretend that you can simply press on without limits.” He goes on to say we need to, “...identify what really got us into education, and find ways to do that valuable work we know to be so important for students and teachers.”

“...take care of yourself.”

“...your job is the hardest job I know of.”

Thank you, God, for giving me this chapter when I needed it most. Thank you, Aaron, for writing this book! God bless you!

There Are Some Days.....

Not all blog post can be good ones. This is one of those...

As positive as you try to be, there are just some days where the blahs get to you. This week, things began piling up, and today is one of those days. The kind of day where you begin to question everything....

Am I doing enough to keep my students safe, happy, and healthy?

Am I being informative and kind enough to the parents of my students?

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        Am I doing my best to uphold the district policies and procedures?

It's Friday night and I feel like I'm drowning...

****I know it will get better, but...

What Did YOU Get For Christmas?

     This is a famous question after the holidays, right?

     What I got for Christmas can't be purchased anywhere. In a world that is becoming increasingly materialistic, I got something that has no price tag. I received time. Time with my family.

      It's been three years since all of our children were together, at our house, for the holidays. This year they were back together, along with their significant others, and our precious granddaughter. This was such a blessing for us! The best gift....EVER! We played games, laughed our fannies off, ate, drank, and of course, opened gifts. Though a couple of the significant others had to go be with their families for part of the time, The Jenkins Originals were all together for three glorious days! My heart is full and I am blessed.

 .            

                                                                                                                              So, a few days later, when I went to see my parents on the farm, and they asked me that famous question: “What did you get for Christmas?” I didn't answer with material things. I answered with “Time.” Time I am so very grateful for and time I can never get back. I am so appreciative for all three of our kids being here at the same time, of their people taking time away from their families to be here, and for the time spent making new memories. I am thankful. I am grateful. I am blessed.                                               

Going Home

This past week, I braved the cold weather and went back to see my parents on the farm where I grew up. For those of you who know Nebraska and it's major highways, I should have turned around at Hebron, NE, on Highway 81. It was freezing rain and I had to get out of my vehicle twice to get the caked ice off my windshield wipers! My husband also let me know that Interstate 80, across Nebraska, was closed at North Platte, NE and the storm was moving east, in my direction. Persistence or stupidity, I'm not sure which, kept me headed north. I can't tell you the last time I had visited the farm, but the pull of something simpler, more restful after the crazy holidays, was calling me.

Here's the truth: My dad is 92. He now uses a walker to get around their home. He also has a new friend, the C-PAP machine, that helps him get a better night's sleep. Earlier this fall, he participate in a sleep study and was found to have sleep apnea. On top of that, my 81 year-old mother, whose early morning constitutional is it to walk four miles a day, had slipped and fell on the the ice on one of her walks and broken her left wrist. (Did I mention that she's also left-handed?) I still had eight days left of Christmas Break after all of the festivities at our house, so I went to check on things and to help out where I could.

I was happy to see that they seemed to be faring pretty well! Mom was adapting to her “Husker Red” cast and it seemed as if my dad was more mobile than I had seen him for quite some time! So, I addressed some Christmas cards, caught up my mom's journaling, helped with meals, gave my dad a break from doing the dishes, and even caught up their ironing. (I HATE ironing!!)

What I didn't expect, though, was to see the farm through different eyes. The miles and miles of roads, up though the cattle yards that I used to traipse through, looking for baby kittens or missing cats who weren't there when I fed them each night. The windmill, that our daughter calls “My windmill,” because when she was little, she would climb to the platform and sit there and say, “I am the master of all I survey!” My bedroom, where, at a very low point, I returned to,with a three year-old in tow, to get my bearings. And the wide open spaces!! Wide open spaces where I would ride my horse, Monkus, for hours! When I was on his back, I felt such a freedom and a sense of peace. Oh, to capture that again!!

       

The church I grew up in. Where, at one time, we even had a children's choir, directed by my aunt, who also directed the adult choir. I remember being in the pew, as young children, with our cousins, right in a direct line of sight from the choir loft where our parents sang. If one of us got out of line, we'd get “the look,” which, more often than not, made us giggle even more because we knew there was nothing they could do without making a spectacle of all of us. This is also the church were my husband and I got married, almost thirty years ago! Some of the families I grew up with still attend church there. Others have moved on and new folks have come in. Fellowship time after church is always a good time, sharing memories and updating the lives of our continually growing families.

But duty and my own family calls and, even though we all prayed for a blizzard that would keep me there until March, it didn't happen. I am thankful for the time I was able to spend at the farm, with my parents and my brother. It's something I can never replace and will never forget!

  

One Word for 2019

A year ago, I came across this idea of choosing one word as my guiding compass for the ensuing year. I was never really any good at following through with New Year's resolutions, anyway, so this sounded like something I could perhaps pull off. Just one word to guide me through the upcoming year. I even went so far as to have a bracelet engraved with my one word, “Peace,” as a daily gentle reminder to be mindful and take deep breaths; that a higher power was in control and I should have the peace that He knows what he's doing in my life.

This year, the word I chose was “strength.” Strength to change some things that I have the ability to change, but have not been able to. Strength to accept some things over which I, personally, have no control. Strength to push myself outside my comfort zone and on to bigger things that I could only have dreamed about just a few short years ago.

Yes, I did get a new bracelet made to remind me of my one word. Yes, this word is going to be a challenge. However, much like “peace,” I believe that I have the inner strength to face this year head-on! Join me and choose your One Word at GetOneWord.com and see where 2019 can take you!