Reflections on Forty-Three Years in Education

 Reflections on 43 Years of Teaching

     When I first began teaching in 1983, my job was with the Special Education department of a school in Lincoln, NE. Our room served as a pull-out classroom for students requiring additional academic support. I met Kim Crow while I was teaching here. This made me want to know more about the special needs population. So, the lady who was “done with secondary  education” went back to college after just one semester in the classroom. I worked during the day and attended classes in the evening, some classes with Kim and some with my neighbor in the apartment complex. Robin.

     After two years of working for Lincoln Public Schools, we moved to Southern California. I was five months pregnant when we moved. I got a job at a privately owned daycare center, teaching two year-olds. Here, I met my friends Karen and Jennie. The private sector was so different from the public sector! There were no rules. Classrooms were overloaded. Children were sent home with parents who were obviously high, and ownership was just in it for the money. (It has since been shut down.)

     Once my first child was born, I did home day care for specifically infants. There was a huge need in the area where we lived. Licensing to provide home day care was lax, at best.  I did this, providing detailed daily written reports to my families on everything from meals, diaper changes, nap time, to milestones in growth.     

     One day, when I was at the park with my child, I noticed that she was trying to give her “blankie” to another child on the playground. I decided that it was time to get more socialization for her. I was offered a job at a church-based daycare center.  While there, I wrote, trained staff, and monitored a developmentally appropriate program to be used in their infant/toddler room.  It was the best of both worlds! I could take my child to work with me.

     In 1989, my child and I moved back to Nebraska. There, I went back to school to renew my teaching certificate. After taking the classes I needed to renew my teaching certificate, we moved to Missouri. In Missouri, I did substitute teaching while having two more children.

     We moved back to Nebraska, where I opened my own preschool. I ran that while helping to manage a restaurant, with three little kids. We were there for four years.

     We moved to Kansas. I got back into teaching by being a substitute again, ultimately landing a job in Leavenworth as a kindergarten/preschool teacher.  I had so many amazing friends while teaching there: Kim Hancock, Holly Schreiber, Ursula Jackson, Bonnie Hill, Christy Jones, Jodie Brice.I taught preschool in the morning and kindergarten in the afternoon. The following year, I would get my preschoolers as kindergarteners.  It  was heavenly to have those students and their families for two years! Talk about relationship-building!  This was also the time that a Master Cohort was offered. There were 15 of us that completed the program. A third of us were kindergarten teachers! About this time was when someone with a lot of power decided that kindergarten should be a full-day program. I was asked if I preferred kindergarten or preschool, with no context. I said, “kindergarten.” My principal said, “Oh, good! Then you can stay in this building.” Preschool was being moved to another building in the district. I taught in the Leavenworth district for ten years.

    We moved to Hutchinson. This was where my former principal had relocated to. I called him to tell him I was moving to the area and he might see me subbing in his building. He told me he was in a principal meeting and there was a building that needed a kindergarten teacher.  I spent 5 years in that building. I met wonderful people there! Kay Jones, Kelly Curry, Kim Stinle, Rod Rathbun, Jesse Ediger, to name a few. When a preschool position opened in the district, I applied for that and was accepted. I transferred buildings.I taught preschool in Hutchinson for three more years.  When I was in Hutch, I was introduced to Jim Sporleder, my edu-hero. He is the person who talked about being trauma-responsive, beginning my journey into learning more and even speaking at national and international conferences.

About this time, the “powers that be” decided that preschool should be a full-day program.  The preschool programs that were housed in individual buildings were now moving to a central location….with the students that had behavior problems. Seriously?? Our most impressionable children were going to be in a building with students that screamed, cursed like sailors, and ran off the school grounds. I put out feelers for another job.      As luck would have it, there was an opening in a neighboring district.  I taught for three wonderful years in the South-Hutchinson/Nickerson School District. Here is where I had the best paras EVER!  Brandi and Katie were amazing to work with. They had the best senses of humor! We called ourselves The Dream Team!  This was also when the damn-demic hit. I was honored to be on the district team and the state team of educators that planned and implemented how we were going to move forward.  Let me tell you; teaching during the pandemic was amazing! We were allowed autonomy to be as flexible as we wanted to be.

     Then we moved to Topeka. I taught for one year in a very interesting situation where a group of low income homes had been converted to individual classrooms. It was an experience. The remainder of my time in teaching was at another school in the Topeka District.I met many amazing people working in Topeka, too! Kristie McBratney, Dr. Gardner, Eva, Keisha, Rachel, Andi, to name a few.

     Let’s not forget those who made this journey what it was. Never a dull moment, for sure. That is the children. Children are little sponges. They absorb everything! You never know what’s going to come out of their little mouths. And every day was an adventure! The children and their families are what made this journey so memorable. I will carry a part of each of you in my heart.

Blame the Teachers: My Version

 I recently read a post on Facebook entitled, “Blame the Teachers.” Its title made me want to read the article. It was not what I was expecting.  Here is my version of the article.

Maxine Moore, 2nd grade. She was my teacher when my father’s plane went down in Vietnam. She, and the guidance counselor, comforted a very sad, very lost, very confused little girl. They allowed her to come to school early, help pass out morning work and sharpen pencils. They loved her and comforted her, and gave her the time and space to adjust to her loss.  Let’s blame them….

Larry Fletcher. High school English. He allowed us to write book reports on any book we chose. I chose, “Helter Skelter,” because it intrigued me. What would cause someone to carry out such heinous crimes? What made Charles Manson tick? I shocked the class (and probably Mr. Fletcher!)  

He allowed us to play “Password,” boys against girls (because that was okay in the ‘70s). What he, and the boys, didn’t know at the time, was that I had learned sign language and taught it to all my girlfriends. We would just spell the work out under the desk and win every single time!  They boys were ticked!

He and his wife, along with some of our other teachers, went snow skiing with us every Spring Break. They were out at our house after every football and basketball game, bringing snacks and playing guitars.

When my longtime boyfriend and I broke up my senior year, Mr. Fletcher came out to our farm to make sure I was okay.

Let’s blame him…..

Diane Knutson. High school band. "Mrs. K" stretched us, musically, beyond what we thought we could do. When I was in high school, we had an amazing music department! Whenever we went to contest, other schools wold cringe. We would fill auditoriums with other schools coming in just to hear our jazz band. She pushed us hard and expected nothing less than our best. We all grew as musicians because of her!

Let's blame her....

Colleen (Norvell Sipich). High school choir, The kindest, most gentle soul I know! I took private voice lessons from her, in addition to what we did in school. She gave me an appreciation for vocal music. I love to sing! She is the reason I chose choir every semester of college. It was my "happy place." She is also the reason I chose to minor in music in college.

Let's blame her, too...

Fran Connealy. High school government. Let’s blame her! She made us bring in newspaper clippings each week to discuss current events. She made us read Time magazine! The nerve! She asked us to write a final paper, minimum of 10 pages, complete with a bibliography, about an event in the United States Government that changed history. Mine was about Watergate. I stayed up past midnight the night before it was due, typing and editing it.  Yes, let’s blame her for making us care about our country and what was happening and showing us what it would be like to write a term paper when we got to college. Let’s blame her….

Dr. Petersen. College Anthropology. I failed his first test. His teaching assistant wrote the test. Apparently, what I thought was important was way different than what his TA thought was important! I scheduled a meeting with Dr. Petersen. I was scared! He was a big man, tall, with a long beard. Intimidating. Turns out he was anything but. He quizzed me over the information he had taught and I nailed every question. That semester, if I didn’t do well on a test or quiz, he would have me come to his office to discuss the material. I ended up with a B in that class.  Let’s blame him….

Lori Beadell. College choir. I only needed two Fine Arts credits. I took her choir class every semester but my first one.  She said, “You know you don’t need more credits.”  I told her that music was my escape with everything else going on around me, it was my calm in the storm.” She made me her music secretary, cataloging and pulling music for her.  Let’s blame her….

Paul Cowell. Masters Instructor. We were used to working in small groups, having time for discussion. Paul believed in lecturing, the.whole.time. You could barely ask a question during his class. I needed a silver lining.  Here’s one thing he said that sticks with me to this day: “Involve families early, and in a positive manner.” This is my mantra now! I try my hardest to do this through Family Meetings before school starts and other methods throughout the school year. To date, I have had 100% attendance at Parent-Teacher conferences for 18 years, running.  Let’s blame him….

Jim Sporleder. Trauma-Informed Consultant. Former principal. Where to even start? When I heard Jim speak for the first time, I literally wept! He is the one who gave a name to what I believe teaching should be. We need to meet the physical and emotional needs of our students before we can ever expect them to learn! I am honored to have met him, have him mentor me, and call him my friend. Let’s blame him….

Teachers.

 Let’s blame them. 

Let’s blame them for caring, even when their workload is heavy.

Let’s blame them for taking time, even if it takes time away from their own families.

Let’s blame them for creating the ability to learn something new.

Let’s blame them for finding a way, and continuing to teach through the damn-demic.

Let’s blame them for our own ability to have a job.

Let’s blame them for the noble job they are doing when no one appreciates them.

Let’s blame them…..

How Do You Say Good-Bye?

    As I write this, tomorrow will mark three months since Chuck’s spirit left us for heaven. I have mulled over how to put his loss into words for quite a while. I probably still won’t get it right, because his loss is ever-evolving, I hope that this can give some insight.

     Chuck was born, prematurely. He had multiple surgeries before the age of three. That didn’t stop him from being a four-year, four-sport letterman throughout his high school career, though. Whenever he would have his sports physical, doctors would always say, “He’s got some kind of murmmur. We’ll keep an eye on it.”  

     Fast forward to when he was thirty-four, married, with three children. He contracted strep and it settled in the fluid around his heart. In the middle of finding this medical problem, doctors found an aneurysm between the two upper chambers of his heart and a hole under that aneurysm (Remember? He’s got a murmur??) He had open heart surgery to repair that. It was around this time that I began to realize that my days with him were numbered. This led to a lifetime of problems with afib. He had multiple procedures to try and correct it, but nothing really seemed to do the trick. In 2015, he had a pacemaker/defibrillator implanted.

     Before Chuck got sick this winter, he was in the best shape of his life. His weight was down, he was active. We were remodeling an 1873 limestone schoolhouse. Then he got sick. He just couldn’t shake it, like he had done in the past. Then his pacemaker started sending out an alarm. He called his cardiologist. They told him the lifespan of his pacemaker had run its course and it needed to be replaced, so that’s what we did.  Never once did it occur to me that he wouldn’t rally. He always had before.

     But that was not to be the case this time. His heart was simply too sick  For the life of me, I still don’t understand how someone with such a huge heart couldn’t rally, but it was not to be.

    How do I say good-bye to someone I’ve shared more than half my life with–the good, the bad, and the ugly?  We share three beautiful children that I know he would be immensely proud of every single day of their lives, the chosen spouses of our children, again, who are amazing humans. And those grandchildren?? Those children would light up his face every time he was around them!

     As for me? There’s just a big hole.I’ve lost my confidante and best friend. He was my biggest supporter, and while we may not have seen eye-to-eye on everything, he would still be there to listen. We had a comfortable life, working on the house and spending time with kids and grandkids. Now everything is in turmoil and I’m just trying to make sense of it and make choices that are right for me, in my new reality, and make him proud.

      I know he’s watching down on all of us, holding his grandbabies that went before him, playing with the dogs that went before him, and sharing laughs with his family members.

#OneWord2025: Rise

      As I was pondering my new word, and writing down options that I thought might apply, this one just jumped out at me!

     My favorite song, "You Raise Me Up, by Josh Groban was the catalyst:

         "When I am down, and oh, , my soul so weary.

          When troubles come and my heart burdeded by

          Then I am still and wait here in the silence

          Until You come and sit awhile with me.

          You raise me up so I can stand on mountains

          You raise me up to walk on stormy seas

          I am strong when I am on Your shoulders

          You raise me up to more than I can be."

Then, as I was praying, my favorite scripture came to me, and I knew I had chosen the right word!

Isaiah 40:31 says "Those who wait on the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not be weary, they will walk and not faint."

     There are a couple of reasons I feel strongly about this word, one personal and one professional.

Personally, I have had one knee replacement surgery and am looking at another the beginning of the summer. "Grueling" doesn't begin to cover the physical therapy, but it's going to be so worth it! I've got young grandchildren to chase around and a house that still needs lots of remodeling work done.

Professionally, I will continue to fight for my students, even when it feel like I am standing alone. There are many, many times that I feel like others are saying "Well, we don't have those services for PreK." or "That doesn't apply to PreK."  PreK is foundational for all future educational successess, but that is a blog for another time. For the purpose of this blog, let's just say that I will rise up and work tirelessly to get my students the support they need to be successful.

Rise!

I AM JUST SO DAMNED PISSED!

      Another school shooting.....

      Two teachers...dead

      Two students...dead. Many more injured.

      When will it stop? 

      When will all of the lawmakers do the right thing and take the necessary steps to help alleviate these kinds of tragedies from continuing?

     I know, I know.....

     There's all kinds of blame to go around and we've heard it all:

• It's the parent's fault for not locking up their guns.
• It's the classmates' fault for not noticing something was "off" with another classmate
• It's the school's fault for not addressing the mental health needs of the students

    And the list goes on and on and on....

Bottom line? Until our lawmakers step up to the plate and make this the national problem that it truly is, and allocate the funding to address ALL of it, nothing is going to change. NOT ONE DAMN THING!  We're just going to keep losing teachers who were only trying to protect their children, along with innocent children. While we all just stand back and wring our hands. It's time to #DOSOMETHING

Join me. This is the link to a foundation set up by THE Matthew McConaughey and his wife, Camila, in the aftermath of the Uvalde, TX school shooting.  https://www.greenlightsgrantinitiative.org/   Share it with every school administrator you know, far and wide. Let's start a movement!! For our children and our teachers!

Safety and Protection

      In light of last week's assassination attempt, I'm curious, political affiliations aside, is this going to do anything to change our gun control laws, nationally?  I'm guessing not. I'm guessing that lawmakers will treat it as an isolated incident or the colossal screw up of one law enforcement agency or another.

     This is why it concerns me: If highly trained Secret Service and law enforcement officers are unable to protect a former, running President, what makes ANYONE believe that teachers are capable of protecting a classroom of children?

     In my classroom situation, alone, I have a door that leads directly from my classroom to the parking lot, which borders a busy street. That door is all glass. On the opposite side of my classroom are three, floor-to-ceiling windows. Also all glass. If a shooter wanted to get into my classroom, it would be no problem and it would be over before anyone could respond.

     I'm not saying that this is a building problem. It is a district problem. The district is charged with making sure our buildings are safe for our students. The buck stops at the district office.They have the money.  Can you really put a price tag on the safety of the students?

     It's also a gun control problem. Why does Joe Shmoe, on the street, need an AR-style gun? He doesn't. The only people who need those types of guns are law enforcement and our military. Changes need to be made and they have been needed for quite some time. I hope that this latest assassination attempt opens the eyes of some of the  naysayers.

Do Better!

      As I was driving home from school on Thursday, along a busy street, with no shoulders, I noticed a little girl off to the side of the road. She looked to be about the same age as the preschoolers I teach. Across the road was a small park.  I could just see her trying to dart across the traffic to get to the swings! I slowed down, just in case, and kind of took in the setting. There was no adult to be seen.  The little girl was spinning around the speed limit sign (40 mph, which no one was obeying)

     In this day and age, I was afraid to pull over and take her back to her house, so I called the police. I could just see her getting hit or taken. After giving the dispatcher all of the information, he said they would send someone out "as soon as they could."  I decided to turn around and watch.  Do you know how long it took the police to respond to an unaccompanied child next to a busy street in Topeka, Kansas?  THIRTY-FIVE MINUTES!! Unacceptable!

     By the time they got there, the little girl was off running around her little neighborhood. Even though the police had her description, they merely cruised right past her and kept going. Who knows how far from her actual home she was?  Do better!