"That Kid"

     When you dig as deeply as I have into children coming to us from trauma backgrounds, you see things through a very different lens. Now, whenever I watch tv or a movie, I see the circumstances of the characters differently.

Take, for example, “that kid.” You know the one. The kid who gets under your skin. That kid that you have to give a personal invitation to in order to get them to follow directions you've already given. “That kid.”

     I've learned that you shouldn't take that child's behavior personally. That kid is simply communicating an intense need. It is our job to build relationships with our students, to understand them, to know their likes and dislikes, to comfort them, to encourage and support them.

     Deep down, they're all good kids, with potential, with dreams and things that they care about. With many of these kids, we, as their teachers, don't get to see this. This is what they are feeling inside, why they act out. They are afraid. They are in pain. They are sad. They show us this with their anger and their defiance. They are the children who have been let down by important adults in their lives. They have learned not to count on anyone or anything. Because of this, what we see is acting out and defiance. It's a cover for the pain they are feeling.

     This is their cry for help! They want the same thing everyone else does. They want safety, security, and to be loved. These kids are fragile. They want the same thing every other kid wants. They just have so much junk in the way, in their homes, and in their developing minds.

     Here's how teachers can help. Ask them questions. Give them a safe place to be. Maybe, slowly, they will learn to trust you. Or it could take a long time, and you won’t see any progress in your time with them, but your patience, love and kindness toward “that kid” will plant a feeling, an idea, that could grow and bloom several years later. Just love them. Everything else will fall into place.

I Can't Do It...

As the end of yet another school year is quickly approaching, I cannot, and will not, countdown to the last day with my students. I simply can't do it. I've never been able to. Have there been times in the past thirty five years that I've thought about it? I'd be lying to you if I said “no.” Still, I've never been able to countdown.  

    Why, you might ask? There are many reasons, but     what it boils down to is that in my tiny little classroom, year after year, we've become a family. When you spend 150+ days together, it's hard not to. Of the sixteen students currently in class, thirteen of them have been with me since Day #1!

This year, I found something a little different to do with my students. I took a picture of each of them and asked me to tell them something they felt they were good at. Next, I put their picture with their statement they gave me on the bulletin board. Each day, I'm going to take down the one belonging to the Special Helper for the day, glue it into the middle of a piece of poster board, and ask each child in the class to tell me something they like about that student. I'm going to write it on the poster board surrounding the Special Helper's picture and give it to them as a keepsake for their time in my classroom.

     I started today. Let me tell you, when it came time for the rest of the class to tell me something they liked about the child in the center, I almost cried in front of the whole class! They were so sweet and kind! I thought to myself, “If all I've done this year is to teach them to be kind to one another, then that's good enough for me!” This group of children who came together with me, a new teacher in the building and some not knowing one another have become a tight-knit group of children. I pray that they continue to be these caring, compassionate children as they grow. The world we live in needs more of this.

When I think of this year's class and their kindness and empathy, I am constantly reminded of Isaiah 11:6, where it says, “and a child shall lead them.” That's how I feel about these children! They can be leaders with their kindness.

Each year, I know I'm going to miss my students and each year it's for a different reason because each class is unique. Building relationships is hard work, but oh, so worth it!!

Thoughts & Prayers for My "Flyover State"

My “Flyover State”

The flooding in Nebraska has hit close to home. I was born and raised in Nebraska. The state slogan, “Nebraska-The Good Life,” could not be more true. I can't even imagine growing up anywhere else. The wide open spaces, the gorgeous sunsets, baby animals every spring, the flower and vegetable gardens my mom so lovingly tends to, riding my horse in the hills around our family farm. Sounds picturesque, doesn't it? I had the BEST childhood ever!! My parents still live on our family farm.

The devastation caused by both the flooding and the blizzard in the western part of the state is nothing short of catastrophic!! It will take years for our nation to recover.

Nebraska produces 27% of the nation's beef. It is calving season. Hundreds of calves have been lost to either drowning or freezing to death...hundreds!!

If you don't know a farmer, I can introduce you to several. They aren't thinking in terms of last finances. They think in terms of loss of life. The loss of life of any farm animal those farmers take to their very hearts. It takes a special man to want to be a farmer. A man who put in incredibly long hours caring for the land and the animals he raises. A farmer's heart is undoubtedly larger than other human's. He is the caretaker of God's land and it's animals. That takes a big heart.

Nebraska is also a leading producer of corn...the ethanol that you all put in your gas tanks, the food on your table. All of this has been dramatically compromised! Your produce prices are sure to go up. That's the process of supply and demand. It's not what a farmer thinks about. A farmer is concerned about feeding his livestock, of being able to care for those animals who count on him every day. If you have never fed an orphan calf from a bottle or let a calf such on your fingers with it's rough tongue, you are really missing out!

 

Then there are the roads and bridges. Nebraska's very infrastructure has been decimated! Bridges that have withstood waters for years have been completely washed away. Highways are half to mostly gone.

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Do you know that if I wanted to go back to the farm today, I couldn't get there from here in Kansas, unless I flew in to Sioux City, IA and came back into Nebraska from the north, and maybe not even then, but that would be my best bet.

The farmsteads that have withstood centuries of families who want nothing more than to work the land and care for God's creatures are gone. Yes, gone! Washed completely away! Centuries and generations of family farmsteads just gone. The pictures do not tell enough of the story. So many people are displaced. So many people have lost everything. (That's ice chunks in the photos below)

 

It's hard for me to even wrap my brain around.

I can't begin to tell you how sad I am for the good people in my “flyover state.” There are no words.

When Life Throws You a Curve Ball

Things are just clicking along, running fairly smoothly, and BAM! Life throws you a curve ball. 

 It happens to everyone at some point in time, often several times in one's lifetime. How you respond to those curve balls defines your character. 

You could curl up and ignore the world, hoping it will go away. However, the damage is done and nothing can change that. 

You could be pissed off and angry at the world. What's that going to solve moving forward?

Or, you could accept it as one of life's many challenges, learn from it, and move forward. As quote from Winston Churchill says, “If you're going through hell, keep on going.” Rodney Adkins even made it into a song.

Make your peace, scream, cry. Do what you need to do to come to a resolution in your own mind, but never give up!

The Kansas Division for Early Childhood Conference

Whenever I go to a conference or workshop I like to post about it, so here goes!

On February 28^th & March 1^st I went to the Kansas Division for Early Childhood Conference with two other preschool teachers in our district. The keynote speaker was from the University of Washington and spoke about a project there dealing primarily with children who had been identified and placed on the Autism Spectrum. Following her address, there were breakout session the rest of the morning.

The first session I went to talked about the positive aspect of flexible seating, which I would LOVE to incorporate into my classroom environment somehow. I am currently researching the cost and feasibility of this idea! Next, it was time for lunch.

After lunch, we thought we would attend a session entitled “Move & Grow Together: Creative Movement Groups for Young Children. We thought it might get our blood pumping after a delicious lunch. We were sadly mistaken. While the information shared was good, it did not involve attendee participation.

The next session I attended was “From Frustration to Success: A Social-Emotional Journey.” I was thrilled to hear the speaker talk about all of those piece of classroom practices that are near and dear to my heart. In addition, she mentioned my three edu-heroes: James Moffett for Derby Hills Elementary School in Derby, KS, Jim Sporleder my guru from Walla Walla, WA, and Rebecca Pancratz-Lewis from ESSDACK, right here in Hutchinson!!

The last session of the day that I attended was “Strategies to Meet the Social and Emotional Needs of Early Childhood Students. This covered some of the same ideas and strategies I already use in my classroom, as well as some other ideas I may look in to.

The next day there were just two sessions: “Beyond the Typical Preschool Classroom” and “Exploring Kansas MTSS and Alignment Through a Preschool Lens.” The one about beyond a typical preschool classroom was amazing and interactive! We learned about different ways pf engaging families, implementing flexible seating, and STEM activities for Preschool. So much fun!!

The last session we attended was, honestly, a stab in the dark, but we were so glad we went to it! The facilitator talked about how preschool is foundational in the public school setting. Since we will be having a district preschool meeting this next week, we are taking the ideas shared in this session to that meeting.

Reflecting on those two days, I would have to say that I learned a great deal, my brain is spinning, and I was blessed to spend two days with our fabulous preschool team...even though I missed my students terribly!!

It's Hard

Teaching is hard work. Teaching Preschool is even harder. Let me share with you some bullet points about why I believe this to be true.

• For many families, this is their first public school experience. Even if it's not, the teachers vary from year to year with the high rate of teacher turn-over.
• There are rules, policies, and expectations that need to be enforced for the safety, protection, and education of all.
• It's a learning curve for everyone; students, their families, the teachers, the school, the bus drivers, the custodians, the cooks, the school nurses, etc. Every child that walk through the school doors has their own uniqueness about them. EVERY.ONE.OF.THEM. Let that soak in for a second; 300-500 unique people all in one place, for 7 ½ to 8 hours each day.

Hear me out. We WANT your kids in school. We look forward to seeing their smiling faces each day. We look forward to the stories the share with us and their bright, eager, ready-to-learn faces. Here's the thing, though; not at the expense of the other children entrusted to our care each day. That's where the policies and procedures come into play.

The school district and it's board of education have put into place a huge notebook of policies and procedures that make the day-to-day functioning of the district's buildings as fair and as equitable as humanly possible. It is the responsibility of the classroom teachers to, besides teaching your children, enforce these policies. No ifs, and, or buts. A great deal of time, effort, and discussion was put into making these policies. They are not up for interpretation. They are there for the safety and protection of the students. Period.

So, if a parent receives a call from the nurse's office, saying that their child is running a fever, the correct response is, “I'll be right there.” The policy says “fever/symptom free, without medication.” That doesn't mean a parent can give the child a fever-reducer and send them to school. That medication will wear off before the end of the day, and the parent will receive a call to come and get the child. It also doesn't mean, when you come to pick your child up, you ask if they're sure they're sick. They are running a fever. They are going home. It's the policy.

Here's where communication comes into play. If the parent has a child who typically runs a normal temperature higher than 98.6., tell someone-the nurse or the teacher. If the child has an inhaler or epi-pen at school, the teacher should know that, as well. If the student has been on an antibiotic for an ear infection, strep, etc., let the teacher know. Teachers are not mind readers. Parents need to communicate with their child's teacher, not post a rant on social media.

Parents! You know your child better than any teacher could ever hope to. However, you have to communicate with the teacher so that he/she can be the best teacher possible for your child. If your child has had a rough night, tell the teacher. If the child is pretending to be sick so they can come home, tell the teacher. If the child is struggling with a peer, tell the teacher. Sometimes there are things we miss. It's human nature.

Bottom line: We're all on the same page, only wanting the best for each student in our classroom. Teaching is hard. Not only do we teach the child, we teach the parents, too. This is a partnership and will be for the rest of the child's formal education. The sooner we all work together as a team, the better it will be for all of us.

"You Can't Save Them All"

“You can't save them all.” In my thirty four years of teaching, I've had not one, but two administrators say this to me about one of my students. I can't begin to tell you how this statement angers me! What is our job as teachers? I believe it is to impact our students so that the world will be a better place, To teach them empathy, social skills, peaceful conflict resolution, and a whole host of other soft skills, on top of the academics.

My job IS to save them all! If I don't believe this with my whole heart, then I'm in the wrong profession. I need to love them fiercely, regardless of their idiosyncrasies, their gender, their race, the socio-economic place in society. Accept them where they are, as they are. That's our job! So when an administrator says, “You can't save them all,” I think it's time for that administrator to step away from public education.

I am reminded about a poem, first brought to my attention by a fellow teacher, very good friend, and simply amazing human being! In her address to the district upon being named the Elementary Teacher of the Year for the district, Holly Schreiber shared this story with the rest of us. It touched me then, just as much as it continues to touch me and I try to emulate the idea behind it. I will share here:

The Legend of the Starfish

A vacationing businessman was walking along a beach when he saw a young boy. Along the shore were many starfish that had been washed up by the tide and were sure to die before the tide returned. The boy was walked slowly along the shore and occasionally reached down and tossed the beached starfish back into the ocean. The businessman, hoping to teach the boy a little lesson in common sense, walked up to the boy and said, "I have been watching what you are doing, son. You have a good heart, and I know you mean well, but do you realize how many beaches there are around here and how many starfish are dying on every beach every day. Surely such an industrious and kind hearted boy such as yourself could find something better to do with your time. Do you really think that what you are doing is going to make a difference?" The boy looked up at the man, and then he looked down at a starfish by his feet. He picked up the starfish, and as he gently tossed it back into the ocean, he said, "It makes a difference to that one."

     This is how I feel teaching should be, to make a difference to that one.